Diverse and beautiful


 

 

Local author Faith Lynn found her voice through prose. In 2020, Lynn’s first book was published with the release of “Tainted Nights,” a collection of poetry. But her writing started long before then.

“I dedicate this book to everyone who believed in me,” she wrote. “I also dedicate this book to my sixth grade English teacher, Mrs. [Jan] McCay Walsh, for planting the seed and telling me, ‘Always write from the heart.’”

And that’s just what she has done. Over the years, her poems have been “conceived and birthed in moments of varying sadness, spiritual awakening, and lustful yearning in my life,” she explained. “They encapsulate my intense montage of conflicting emotions regarding the stages of real-life relationships upon which they were based.”

Lynn grew up in Oneonta. She graduated from Oneonta High School. She is now raising her two children.

“I had my share of racial prejudice growing up,” she said. “Although it didn’t appear racist at first, it soon became apparent, in retrospect. The defining moment came when, in high school, a boy I liked paid particular attention to me… walking me to class, talking with me regularly, even stealing the occasional kiss.

“One day, he made a statement overturning my life. He said, ‘I wish you were white so I could take you home to meet my parents.’ A chance statement or not, it hit me like a thunderbolt. The seed was planted that I was inferior due to my color. It bore effects that remain today, an over-riding feeling of anxiety and feeding into my depression that I was, and am, worthless.

“No one should be made to feel inferior due to skin color. It made its mark on me. This one to me really hit home. The other incidences I brushed off as ‘stupidity,’ but this one hurt because I liked him.”

The Blount Countian thanks Lynn for sharing the following two poems. Her story is our story. Black history is American history.

Enough
I feel the pain of my people
In the heart of this land
We are tired
We cry in the night
Suffer in the day
The cries of my people quake the foundation of this
blood-stained land
We are praying
We are waiting
We had enough
Let the fire rain down and singe the ground
Let the thunder rumble and lightning strike the sky
Let the riders mount their horses and ride across
the Euphrates
Let the lion roar to the trumpets of the seventh seal
Hear the silence in heaven
Feel the tremble as God reclaims this world
Let the rivers run crimson
With the oppressors life
Let Death and Karma birth a seed of vengeance for
the unjust
Let us now bow down and repent
For the days of Elijah are before us

Northern Star

I don’t know where I am going
I am just trying to find my way.
The seed was planted years ago
Long before God blew life in my lungs
Guilt. Sadness. Worthlessness. Restlessness. Nigger.
These seeds are deeply rooted.
Discrimination. Segregation. Inequality. White
privilege.
Please don’t be upset if I never speak to you.
I didn’t mean to be rude. We were once told not to
speak.
Head bowed.
Tongue tied.
I became a slave of your idea of us.
Stripped of everything pure and holy.
Used. Broken. Discarded.
Then he found me.
My depression, you see, he is a jealous lover.
I now know wolves lurk among the sheep
My shepherd must have been asleep.
Creeping in and taking what he wants.
Joy. Love. Hope.
Leaving me the scraps.
Pain. Hurt. Emptiness.
He is abusive, you know how that goes
Increasing my self-destructive behavior.
Isolation. Anxiety. Fear.
Beating and belittling me
Leaving me to hide my bruises
“I’m fine” I tell people
I don’t know where I am going
I am just trying to find my way.
I put on a smile for the world because
Black women aren’t allowed to be depressed
We have to care for a world that refuses to see and
listen to us.
Depressed? Maybe my heart is just broken.
Can you see and hear me now?
I don’t know where I am going
I am just trying to find my way
I am not an immortal
I cry when I am hurt
I smile in the rain
God found me in my ashes
Don’t disturb my peace that I struggled to find with
your false sympathy.
Let me find the moments of life that take my breath
away
So I can give it to others, and they can see the beauty of life.
A violet blooming in darkness.
I don’t know where I am going
I am just trying to find my way.

In closing, Lynn wrote, “Thank you for sharing my journey from heartbreak to healing. If you are in heartbreak, know that your healing is on the way.”

You can find “Tainted Nights” on Amazon.